Transforming Frusteration

I took my 9 year old cousin snowboarding the other day and he reminded me about the importanance of learning to get through frusteration in a more soothing and peaceful manner. If any one has expirience with learning how to snowboard- or learning anything for that matter- we know that there are many times of deep frusteration. Feeling like we are "NEVER going to get it" and we want to just quit! But we also know the feeling of overcoming that frusteration and finishing or learning somthing new. A feeling of exitment, fulfillment and being proud of ourselves is such a wonderful place to get to. I see many people go through life getting so bogged down by small events that create frusteration within them. This makes me sad because I can see them causing unessicary suffering apon themselves. So I wanted to take a moment to jot down a couple of tricks you could try if you are prone to easy irritation and frusteration (either within yourself, with others or just with the changing events in life).

1) When Frusteration Arises within you- notice it before you get too involved and remined your self to take a couple DEEP breaths into the belly. By breathing into the belly you are activating the nervous system- more spacifically the parasympathetic nervous system- which will slow your heart rate down and help return you back your natural- calm state.
2) Once you have calmed the body/mind and emotions and you are still frusterated, ask yourself if being frusterated helps the situation. Most likly the answer will be no. If this is the case, see if you can let frusteration go.
3) Once frusteration has been let go of, see if you can redirect your thoughts into somthing that is of service to you in some way.

I will give an example that I am sure we have all encountered at some point in our driving history.
Scenerio A: Being stuck in Traffic and it is causing you to be late to work.

1) Frusteration begins to arise: thoughts such as "Why are there so many $#%# people on the road!", "I NEED to be at work in five minutes" "Ugg, I am wasting gas just stalling here!"- So catching your self, before the horn honking, glaring, and swearing begin and reminding yourself to breathe. Dissassociating from the mind and tuning in to only the breath.
2) Now in a calmer place, asking yourself "Is it serving me or anyone else in traffic by being frusterated?" Well, it is only making me angry, and if others are receptive to my negative energy and I project that onto them, that will make them angry too. So, the answer is No- this feeling of frusteration is not serving me.
3) Now can we transform this stagnant and nonbenefition emotion- into a positive one? YES. First, I will call my boss and let him know I am running a bit late to work.Now I can let go of the worry that I will get in trouble for being let. Then I will redirect my thoughts to somthing positive or educational, maybe even trying to make the wait more enjoyable. Perhaps drumming on my steering wheel, maybe turning on some tunes and singing as loudly as I can, maybe making up a rap. Whatever your pleasure is- enjoy your new found play time in the car!